Everyone has a bucket list, or some form of quest, in which you try all the things you’ve never done before.
Mine is fairly straightforward: go sky-diving, travel to Japan, climb Ben Nevis. You get the idea.
But one peculiar and unusual thing has been checked off by pretty much everyone else in the United Kingdom.
Except for me.
Ladies and gentlemen, I have never experienced a bottomless brunch.
In all my 23 years and counting, I was yet to try one of the most in-demand deals offered by restaurants.
Of course, I have had brunch before – many, many, many times. But, as an eager brunch-goer myself, I was missing out on the most fun meal of all.
So when I saw a wealth of venues and locations in London offering unlimited drinks and tasty food, I knew I had to finally tick this off my list. On top of this, after moving down from Scotland to the big capital city, how else was I going to get the full London experience?
Recommended by a friend, I booked a table for two at cocktail bar and restaurant Canova Hall in Brixton.
The deal was to go bottomless for two hours, costing £30 per person, and you could purchase a main meal on top of it.
On a chilly Saturday afternoon, I turned up at Brixton to finally try my first ever bottomless brunch.
As I was directed to my table, I could not quite believe my eyes.
So. Much. Alcohol.
Spread across the table included a bottle of Pink Prosecco, a bottle of sparkling Prosecco, a bowl of Canova Rum Punch and a make-your-own bubbly cocktail tray.
Would I survive?
With this question in mind, my plus-one had already poured me a full glass of prosecco and handed it to me.
Gulp. I began to think of my poor liver.
One drink turned quickly into a second, before I knew it I was double-parked with two glasses in my hands.
I had to order food quickly if I wanted to leave this place alive.
The waiters were very attentive and friendly, making sure that my meal accommodated with my allergies – which was a bonus.
I quickly devoured a plate full of gnocchi, which made me feel guilty as I didn’t appreciate the taste or quality enough.
All I cared about was lining my stomach.
Drinks continued to flow, with the Canova rum punch being my popular beverage of choice.
The marriage of flavours between the lime, rosemary and rum made the drink taste like gorgeous orange squash.
I had to stop myself from downing the entire bowl – it tasted amazing.
After one hour, I will admit that I was tipsy. Drinks were still flowing and I started to worry – do I up the pace? Do I slow down? Do I switch drinks?
Baffled as to what I should do, across the room I saw a gaggle of girls singing Happy Birthday to one of their friends. The room burst with life and vigour, so I knew I needed to match this energy.
‘Pour me another one,’ I said to my friend. Dutifully she filled my prosecco flute to the brim.
At this moment, I knew I had been missing something from my London life and this was it. For my generation, bottomless brunch is a rite of passage.
I was soon obsessed with taking photos of my food, whilst posing for the camera with a tipple in hand. I was having the absolute time of my life.
The giddiness of being sat in a restaurant surrounded by complete strangers whilst getting intoxicated was marvellous.
Everything was a true spectacle to behold; the free-flowing Prosecco, mouth-watering sharing plates, the bustling waiters making sure everyone was topped up and the screeches of people trying to get the last of their prosecco – it was INSANE.
This was life-changing.
I wanted to make the most out of my dedicated slot time, so I kept drinking and drinking.
But, alas, all good things must come to an end.
We were quickly ushered out of the restaurant at 3pm on the dot after paying. Looking back, I left behind at least a glass of pink prosecco in one bottle.
Goodbyes are the worst, and this farewell well and truly left a mark on me.
But, looking on the bright side, I survived. I wasn’t stumbling down the streets of Brixton surprisingly – but a part of me wishes that I was.
Overall, I couldn’t believe I had not ticked this off my bucket list sooner.
I am now counting down the days until my next bottomless brunch date. Please be soon.
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